When I was about 12 years old, I broke my piggy bank, took all of my savings and bought an old bicycle that required a great degree of fixing up before I could have rode it.
To add to my pains, it took me an additional four months to save some repair money to get the bicycle up and running.
Nonetheless, by the time I was thirteen, I was able to start riding the cycle around the neighborhood.
The trials and tribulations that I had went through to get the cycle up and running was more than enough reasons for me to take up a silent oat that I will never part with that bicycle or even loan it to anyone.
But after one week of riding around, I found myself having to go to the cycle repair man in the village almost every three days to fix various emerging flaws that would gradually evolve from the use of my bicycle.
From the first repair shop visit, the problems with my prized piece of pedal transport never seemed to cease. So you can imagine me struggling from week to week to repeatedly repair that cycle.
I sold greens from the family farm and even fruits from the inner farm lands to sustain it.
By the end of two months, I had spent more time and money on maintaining the cycle than the cost of the bicycle itself.
Overtime, I became really frustrated in as much that I had decided to let it go, since my finances and my time was going into a downward spiral.
Even my parents and relatives angrily urged me to let the troubled cycle go. But for my onlookers, the troubled cycle was their daily piece of laughter and sarcasm.
However, every time I thought about the sacrifices and efforts that I had already made to buy it and the past costs to periodically maintain, my heart hardened against letting the cycle go.
But my desperation to hold on to the troubled bicycle soon pushed me out of money. As such, I began to shorten my parents’ grocery money to maintain the bicycle. And when that was no longer enough, I simply took the monies reserved for my back to school gears, followed by absenteeism from school and social activities, since I was committing all of my time and efforts into the cycle.
By the end of six months, I was entrapped in a scenario that knew no joy, as I struggled to keep the bicycle working.
But fortunate for me, I was so exhausted with the bicycle that I woke up one morning with a sudden epiphany to save myself and simply let the bicycle go.
And that was what I did.
I loosen it into several parts and packed it away in an old rice bag, with a commitment never to try to fix it again. After all, I had had enough.
A few weeks later, and in my own quiet time, I realized that there are certain things in life that ought not to be fixed. Because, the more you try to fix it, the more harm and pain you will be causing yourself.
And in the end, you will eventually discover that all you had done was ridiculously waste an entire chapter of your life for something that will never allow you to enjoy a proper period of happiness with it.
So from the moment I let that troubled cycle go, I was able breathe freely again, save again, restore my connections to reality again, and felt at peace again.
Years later, I was able to apply that lesson to most of my life experiences, even in times when it may have hurt me to apply it to relationship processes.
But many of us repeatedly make the same mistake of trying to fix people and things that cannot be fix, or try to fix relationships that cannot be fixed; – only to realize that we are placing ourselves in a sink hole from which we might never be able to emerge.
What is the use wasting your years trying to fix a cheating partner, a roaming spouse, a disloyal wife, or an ungrateful husband when that person has given you every indication that they cannot be fixed (or do not want to be fixed)?
Like that old bicycle that had taken all of my early life savings and sanity away from me, many of us are silently going through that same process that drags us into doing everything and anything to fix a relationship that can never be fixed.
Are you really inclined to keep going down that road?
If my simple bicycle lesson can mean anything to you, then it might be time for you to make up your mind to simply let go of the fractured people in your life that cannot be fixed.
There must be an old rice bag somewhere at the back of your head, where you can dump those efforts into the lost realm of your memories, probably forever.
The choice is yours.